Ok, so I have something I need to get off my chest. Since my husband doesn't ever really read my blog I can openly discuss something horrible I have been hiding. I am being a little dramatic, it's not that horrible, just a little bit horrible, but horrible none the less. Does anyone else live with a snorer? I do. I hate it. I love him but I hate the nose noise coming from his handsome face. It never fails that he falls asleep before I do, making it almost impossible for me to fall asleep peacefully. Hence, why I am up now at 12:58 am. Don't get me wrong, I eventually fall asleep but I look at it more like passing out from exhaustion. Night after night this happens.
Here is where the confession comes in. How do I finally get a little shut eye? Well, I poke and prod my husband until he stops...Temporarily. I pinch his nose. I poke his side. I rub his hair or back. I whisper in his ear to "STOP IT!". I lightly tickle his armpit hair when available (he really hates that when he is awake). I talk out loud. I nudge him and try to get him to move. I sometimes do this for half an hour. When it goes too far and he wakes up I close my eyes and pretend I have been sleeping the whole time. The sad thing is that I kinda like it when he wakes up puzzled. I feel bad but only for a nano second. The good thing is that sometimes he stops and rolls over and doesn't snore for the rest of the night. Those are the nights that make it worth doing it every night.
Now for my next musing...I hate when I have dreams that Scott has cheated on me. I know he never would but sometimes I dream it. When it happens in my dream I wake up a scorned woman. I try to control the anger but I am sincerely mad at him for "dream cheating". I guess the dreams seem so real that it stirs up quite the array of emotions. I feel for him because he didn't really do anything and I am still mad at him. I mean, I wake up ANGRY and I usually just hit his arm and call him a jerk or asshole. He wakes up confused. I explain that he "dream cheated" and he tells me that it was my dream (therefore, not his fault) and I don't have a reason to be mad him. I know it seems irrational at best but I am still mad after these dreams. I bet those are the days that he is really glad he married me. I also bet he never thinks I am crazy. Does anyone else experience the post "dream cheat" rage?
4 comments:
I have had "dream cheating" nightmares before. I feel your pain----it's such an awful feeling. Andrew doesn't snore, but your short story made me almost pee my pants. That's what I love about you---you always make me laugh!!
Me too. I HATE those dreams. I wake up totally enraged. John says he has similar dreams about me from time to time. It must just be our subconscious minds worrying about "what if..."
I also have a snorer. I used to just use earplugs, but now I'm scared that I won't hear Becca if she wakes up, so I toss and turn around really violently in the bed and that wakes him up enough for him to turn over. I pretend to be asleep when he wakes up, too!!!
I like your new template. Weird about the map dots!
oh my god i am not crazy! i totally get pissed when he "dream cheats" and i also poke at my snorer! for a long time he didnt believe me that he actually snored, i literally had to record him snoring one night and let him listen to himself...
Thanks for the comment on my blog. I love yours too. You are hilarious. As for the snoring thing...I feel sorry for you. I can NOT STAND snoring!! Seriously. I sleep so easy that my family teases me about it. My mom snores and, even a room away, I think that I ended up sleep deprived the first 18 years of my life. If Chris snored I would divorce him. Well, that may be a little drastic. But I would think about. Seriously.
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